In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat – for he grants sleep to those he loves.
Psalm 127:2 NIVUK
Beyond Tether’s End
You are loved. Sleep is granted. I too have been so exasperated by not sleeping, especially when I’ve been lying awake unable to sleep off any of the utter exhaustion and stress of life; the bone and head weariness. I really understand how infuriating it is when these verses are quoted at us like ammo, suggesting, if not lack of love, lack of faith on our part. The Biblical logic is not like ours. It isn’t an algebraic formula. It is a constant state of blessing to be stood under and because you are an inheritor of the promise you are an inheritor of all that goes with it, inclcuding love. Sleep is one of the ways that love is expressed yet for some of the time, on this fallen earth and in the complexities of our lives and individual make up and seasons, though we are loved, (and therefore sleep can be expected as normally granted) there are those of us who cannot receive it at certain times. Lack of sleep is not lack of love or punishment, any more than not being able to run, conceive a baby, do astro physics, be disease free or buy bread. But if you look hard enough there are possibly several of these outcomes posited as signs of God’s love, and they are, but not in a callibrated, universal, mandatory way. You are unique and I pray that you will find that the loving eyes and beating heart of your heavenly daddy will be giving you such a long and loving gaze tonight you have to sleep to escape the intensity of it. Your own heart will confirm that I am not lying. xx
Thanks. I know you’re right xx
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