Hope a wild and heady cliff top bright
Squalling falling now I dash myself
Upon the rocks of disappointment
Jagged reality splitting fleshy dreams
Thrills from the heights now spilled
Spattered red and ready fading
Cold elements unfeeling stealing
All evidence of hope’s prior sights.
What substance now of things unseen
Can chilled bone fragments gather
Breath groan, sinews grow, blood flow
Heart scar seams, could have beens
Waiting with gravity to be redeemed.
She hemorrhages pain.
It splashes alive into my soul,
Running in through my ears and brain,
Please God make it stop
Or make my soul less porous
So that I could swim through the world
Unfazed, a potent paragon
Of bold, sunny, cold perfection
If it would be a bad swap,
If empathy is such rich gold
And I should ache till I am old,
Then show me how to soldier on
But you should know this;
I hate it.
Hot tears splash down my cold face
Which I lose the battle to compose,
Resolve buckles; I fleetingly embrace
The pain that follows the love that I chose
♦
I took the risk of loving you,
The things I said I meant and I believe,
My touch, the laughter and my tears were true
And so this might confirm that I’m naive
♦
Is it folly when fear sees a chance,
To stare it down, and instead choose to trust,
And on foundations of love take a stance,
Knowing vulnerability is a must?
♦
Sacrifice sets true love apart,
You’d heard it said and in your head you knew,
But when it came to choices of the heart
You struggled to let selflessness come through
♦
I’m sorry for not being tough enough,
Having fun with you was just too sweet
For me to want to call your bluff,
Though you’d no intention of deceit
♦
I’ve prayed for you in many words and tears
With great hope cause I can see you’re lovely,
Let Holy Spirit take away your fears
So you can learn to be loved, and love fully
♦
I hope you know I truly don’t regret
Investing in you, even with the pain,
Heavenly Father’s keeping the best yet,
And a precious friendship will remain.
catieeliza 
Written
on Dec 19, 2020